Thursday, June 21, 2007

driving and attention whores

I hate driving.
No, that's not right, I hate other people driving. You should have to take a special class to get certified to drive on wet roads. For example:

When the roads are wet and it is raining do you: A. Slow down and be cautious or B. Slow to 20 below the posted speed limit, drive in the fast lane constantly riding your breaks all the while talking on your cell phone.

I generally don't have a problem with people on the phone while driving, hell, most of the time I am driving, I'm talking to someone. But JESUS CHRIST! If your body can't handle holding the phone up to your head and also pressing on the gas pedal... give up the phone.

Moving on to the Attention Whores part of this blog...

When you pick up little Johnny from his soccer camp, it is NOT necessary to show the entire triangle back of your thong. This bugs me for many reasons, one being quit acting like ho bag Spears, you are the epitome of soccer moms. If you weren't, you wouldn't live in this neighborhood. Another reason is how can you not realize this is happening? You've obviously pulled your drawers up to your earlobes, it can't be comfortable. And also, you are picking up your kid from camp, meaning, you are a mom. A mom old enough to have a kid in camp. Get over it. You aren't 20 years old anymore.

And to the attention whores who drive Hummers. We get it, you have more money than sense. But to pick out a bright ass banana yellow one is just a slap in the face. Now you are showing us that you have more money than common sense and fashion sense combined. No one likes your car. It is a ridiculous waste of three or four parking spots. It is hard to miss on its own, you don't need to paint it neon nor do you need to put your web address of
(that says, I make more money than you and I spend it on stuff like this and not on books that might help my little spoiled brat child learn how to read - you are welcome) The only people I have ever heard say that they like hummers are elementary aged kids. So congratulations fucktard, you have impressed all the 6 year old boys.